A wake-up call for women who are sleep-walking through their lives,
accepting emotional, verbal or physical abuse.
Women Who Think Too Much, A No Help At All Handbook
by Jeanne Marie
Wow by Yahsoldz
Great book but you have to have a strong mind and a strong sense of dark humor to get it. Thank you for the crash course the book kept to the point.
WOMEN WHO THINK TOO MUCH by suzyqmtngurl
As I read through this book I kept constantly seeing myself but also saying, “at least I didn’t have it that bad!” But in the end the truth hits and I sobbed. What a great short read!
Anonymous Review Barnes & Noble
For anyone who even thinks for one second that they are in a codependent relationship or are just trying to avoid ending up in one, please, I urge you to read this book. Dark humor reigns throughout, but so do vital lessons about what to expect in codependent relationships. The author takes us through her pain in order to help the next victim of a codependent life… And yes, I do mean the word VICTIM. The victim is never to blame for some jerk’s destructive behavior. Coming from someone who has said “enough’s enough,” I know life and self-esteem are possible to have. I thank God Himself for His help. I really don’t know what I could have done or who I’d still be right now without Him, and that’s the truth.
Review by Nicole
Hello, I just wanted to tell you I have just finished and read the 12 slips book, I couldn’t put it down. It has been downloaded for a while and just got the chance to read it not knowing what was inside! Coming from a 27-year-old female just almost a year of being out of a 4-year abusive relationship, this book meant so much to me. I never realized that I was codependent and that has carried throughout all my relationships and is being carried with me into the future. Until today, I realized that I need to let go of that and become dependent on my self! Thank you for writing this book, I hope that many other women who are in terrible situations may stumble upon this book and take something from it. I will be recommending this book. Nicole
Review by Orina
I just read your book! I laughed so hard all the way through I almost had to resort to Pampers! But I made it through.
This is the story of my life with my Husband (Deceased now, God rest his soul). I was going to write a book called Codependent and Loving It.
What is funny now is I am a burned out codependent. I don’t give a crap about anyone but myself and my Little Dog, Dolly.
Let me know if you write another comedy. I live to laugh! Thank You for this book! HILARIOUS!
Review by Natalie
I went and read WWTTM earlier today, I had no idea that anyone had to endure such awful demands from a spouse or boyfriend. Bless your heart. I’m so glad you are no longer having to endure such abuse and ridicule. I’m sure it still seems very real to you. It was and that will never change, but you don’t have to go there again! I pray the Lord comfort you and grant you peace when the bad memories come back to haunt you.
Oh, I agree with the review that says this should be required reading for high school students. As an ex-high school teacher, I agree wholeheartedly! Love and hugs, N 🙂
Review by Michelle Marie
Wonderful book! I recommend Women Who Think Too Much, I am a woman who thinks too much. I love this author and her style of writing. I think she has so many wonderful insights and also I found myself laughing because I identify with this book so much. I know you will love it too!
Review by Jenn on Aug. 08, 2014 FIVE STARS
This book should be required reading as part of the high school curriculum. I made a couple of these “slips” early on, but thankfully avoided the worst of it thanks to some very strong and frank women in my life. However, I’ve had many friends who have had to learn the hard way–or never learned, and it’s heartbreaking to watch and so unnecessary.
Thank you, Jeanne, for the very straightforward advice and important reminder for all of us. Speaking of that, I think I need to go pad my “ILFU” fund…. 😉
Review by Michael:
Just finished reading your book, Women Who Think Too Much.
Structurally, I found the book spot on. That’s a compliment to both your writing and your editors. The reading flowed very smoothly.
Content-wise, it was incredibly poignant.
It was heart wrenching to think you went through all that, and to think so many others live like that. I truly was not aware of the intricacies of what goes on behind closed doors in those types of relationships.
I confess that I know of no woman in my circle of friends who lives in those conditions today. I’m not sure if that’s a credit to my choice in friends or the strength and kindness of the people I know.
However, a long time ago (my senior year in high school), I dated a young lady fresh out of a bad relationship that, I can only guess (through rumors at the time), was a lot like what she described.
We dated for almost a year when she abruptly broke it off. After repeatedly asking her why, she reluctantly told me she was going back to her previous boyfriend. From what I knew of her old relationship with this guy, I knew it was very abusive.
I chanced upon her several months after our breakup. When I approached her, she was trying to conceal her black eye behind dark sunglasses. But she assured me she was doing fine.
Years later we met again. She had finally called it quits with him, but not before having two of his children.
So, in an indirect and very personal way, I was exposed to codependency and its abuse.
It truly breaks my heart to hear of situations like this, what you write about. It’s horrific. But I know there are men out there who behave like that. And the cost to women (and the children) is incalculable.
I will never understand how we humans can be so cruel to one another.
You have done a great job with this book. It’s a needed eye-opener, I guess not only just for women, but certainly (and especially) for us men as well.
Jeanne Marie —You are an incredibly strong woman. I know the past was difficult, hard, unbearable and about twenty other adjectives, but that’s your past now. You’re in a much better place today.Thank you for opening my eyes to this subject. And for inviting me into your life, if just from a spectator’s seat.
Ex Animo http://theiamblog.wordpress.com/
Review From Anonymous Survivor: Jeanne, just finished your book. Wow. I lived that life for too many years. I’m still processing what it felt like to go back in time with the words you wrote. I have tried to track my tormentor/ex-husband for all these years and never found him. I have always looked over my shoulder, afraid he would find me first. About a month ago I found his obituary. I never thought I could be relieved by a person’s death. I was, and am. I hope your book acts as a reality check and motivator for women in the thick of codependency. I think this is a much needed book. Should be in every women’s shelter across the country.
Review By S K Nicholls:
This month is National Domestic Violence Awareness month and I am reading a few books this month that focus on this troubling issue in different ways. Today I am giving a book review on one of these.
Jeanne Marie taunts her book as “A No Help At All Handbook” and it is with this degree of sarcasm that she presents her case. Domestic violence is a very serious issue affecting more people in America than the statistics can begin to show. Jeanne Marie does an excellent job aiding women to identify themselves as being in a dysfunctional relationship and what to do (or not to do) about it with her “Twelve Slips”, a spoof off of the Twelve Steps programs. While the small book with big ideas uses a rather comical approach to getting women to loosen up and look seriously at their own behaviors, as well as the behaviors of others, the highly qualified author also emphasizes the importance of recognizing where you may be going wrong and where you can go right. I would highly recommend this book to anyone who even suspects that they might be in a dysfunctional relationship. Even if you are not, you will be entertained, and maybe learn something you can use to help another individual less fortunate. It is both moving and inspirational. It is a brief book, an easy read, and quite affordable as it is FREE right now at smashwords. Download and read a copy today. This is easily a five star book.
S K Nicholls http://redclayandroses1.wordpress.com/2013/10/14/book-review-women-who-think-too-much-by-jeanne-marie/comment-page-1/#comment-1983
Review by Ishaiya
Wonderful! Downloaded. Thank you, Jeanne-Marie. I love your writing style, it’s beautifully poetic, thought inspiring and moving. You have a wonderful sense of humor too! I shall be sure to spread the word. Have a great week!
Review By Eleanor:
This book throws a funny bone at the heart of dysfunctional relationships and hits you right between the eyes.
Dark humor drives this soul-bearing and sobering narrative, but Jeanne Marie lets it fly without losing the gravity of her subject. Beneath the often laugh-out-loud comedy, Marie’s honesty and vulnerability entice you to notice jarringly familiar experiences that exist in your own life. Her words echo unforgettably, resonating into your everyday life, making it impossible to ignore the empowering mirror she has created for anyone who has ever been… is currently… or wants to be… in a relationship.
It amazes me that such a short and fun book is powerful enough to change your life. A must-read for everyone, particularly women and teens!
Review By Maggie Thom:
“Wow. I don’t know where to even start with this but I can tell you that although it is a tough read, it is a must. Women Who Think Too Much is raw and will punch you in the solar plexus. When I started reading it, no I hadn’t read the blurb about it, I thought it was going to talk about how women are so hard on themselves. Which it did, sort of but it’s really one woman’s journey through co-dependency and abuse and her wish to wake up other women who might be living this kind of life or headed for it.
Jeanne Marie shares her journey through co-dependency and abuse but she does it in a unique way, she calls it the 12 slip step to co-dependency, where she uses dark humor for a dark subject. I think that if she’d just shared her journey, I would have felt awful for her but I don’t think I’d have looked at my life quite so closely. It’s interesting because she talks a lot about all the ways and things she did to avoid looking at her own life for a long time. I think it is brilliantly written. It’s only about sixty pages but it is by no means a quick read.
Try catching your breath after you’ve read it because you won’t while you’re reading it. It’s the elephant in the room that no one talks about, no one shares. I guarantee this book will wake you up like none other. Or at least it should.”
Maggie Thom’s Books! https://www.smashwords.com/books/search?query=maggie+thom
“Those damn rose-colored glasses can create such a shady false light that we don’t even recognize the blindfold covering the eyes on the image staring back at us in the mirror. Your book, Women Who Think Too Much, shines a bright light of humor on serious issues. In all that laughter is the courage to put fear where it belongs. Instead of staying afraid to take off the rose-colored glasses, the impulse to keep them on becomes terrifying. (Your mom’s poem is evidence that her sense of humor was a guiding force to a way out of the dysfunctional cycle.)
I’ve read your book…more than once. Instead of congratulatory gratitude (which you absolutely deserve), Jeanne Marie, I give you a big, brave and hearty HEE HA HA YEEHAH! as I stomp my own pair of rose-colored glasses.”
Artist and Publisher of the Wildersoul Colouring Book wrote:
“I like the ‘how not to’ approach, which has a humorous angle, and yet it touches so very deeply.”
Re-blogged on Mm172001’s Blog http://wordpress.com/#!/read/blog/id/13831966/
She wrote: “Already downloaded the book and read it! It’s a great read, informative with humor. Highly recommend it and best part it’s only $1.99!
To Jeanne Marie, “I thought it was great. It took a topic that has been traditionally addressed as you are doing this wrong and this and this and you need to do this. The form in which you wrote your book gave most of the same information but in a humorous way that is less authoritarian but still has the insight.”
Review by: Joyce on April 25, 2013 : FIVE STAR
A must-read for women with Borderline Personality Disorder. Many of us have co-dependency issues. Maybe you can recognize yourself in this book and get the help you need. If you have no sense of your own identity, you need to find out who you are. Jeanne Marie helps you become aware, through her humor, what you’re lacking to become your own person, worthy of not needing someone who controls you.
Review by: Richard on Feb. 23, 2013 : FIVE STAR
I had bought this book for my fiancée, but we ended up reading it together. I really enjoyed it, I laughed out loud.. a lot. Winced in pain like when you hit your knee a few times, I mean I am a man and I am guilty of a lot of the same things in this book…like this one “Classic”!
“Why are the lights on in here? Do you want me to shut them off for you?
Why aren’t there any lights on in here? It’s so dark in here.”
All in all, I just wanted to say it was good to see how a man’s behavior can affect a woman, and after reading this book, I think I can try a little harder to be more considerate.
Review by: Dan on Feb. 23, 2013 FIVE STAR
Take your time when you read through this…then read it again.
A fan of cinema verite? Good thing. Hang on. Jeanne Marie compels you to look in to the mirror and ask yourself if you recognize this wounded gender.
This is not simply a woman’s cautionary tale.
Pull your son away from “Call of Duty”, put a porn blocker on his computer and force him to listen to her story.
Review by: Cherie on Feb 22, 2013 : FIVE STAR
A must read for women of all ages…timely and also timeless lessons for women from every walk of life..it will touch you in ways that you never dreamed of and may even (hopefully) alter the course of your life..and ladies..it’s NEVER too late!
Another great article…
Written by Dr. Eric Perry
“When she asked him whether it was true that love conquered all, as the songs said. ‘It is true’, he replied, ‘but you would do well not to believe it.” ~Gabriel Garcia Marquez
We would all like to believe that when we fall in love it will be forever. The truth is, love is a complicated and fluctuating emotion. It is not a superhero power that will conquer all of life’s problems. One has to treat love with respect and nourish it. By pruning the bad behaviors we can allow love to blossom and flourish. I wrote this post because I believe it is important for all of us to identify the behaviors that are deadly for our relationships.
Dr. John Gottman is a therapist who in 2007 was recognized as one of the most influential therapists of the past 25 years. He is a Professor Emeritus…
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We’ve all experienced the stark terror of staring at a blank page. While we may have an intended topic or a brilliant idea, the thought of conquering the unknown mocks us, and we freeze. What is more perfect than a pristine page? How can we possibly live up to the expectations? How do we proceed? An old saying counsels that we make a trail by walking. It is only when we turn around that we “find” a path. Art teachers encourage their students to make one mark on the canvas.
Sheer physical willpower is my answer. Whether it is bold and daring, or meek and uncertain, action leads to action. I force my fingers to move. I ignore the panic and type whatever words reach my fingertips. No matter how crazy it sounds, or banal, or weird the phrases seem, I let them flow. I push negative thoughts from my…
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As I went to put bobby pins in my hair today, I was caught up in the most amazing memory.
I’m looking in the mirror, and suddenly, I’m watching my mom roll her long, black hair around her finger and then, she uses a bobby pin to hold it in place. Although it is my face, my mom’s face reflects back at me and I smile. I feel eight years old, watching her, the way I did each night before bed for so many years.
Every night, my mom would put those bobby pins in her hair.
Dad, drunk, screaming and yelling, nothing stopped her, nothing he ever did stopped her.
My mum was an amazing, strong and beautiful woman.
She just sat there in her own little space and rolled up her hair.
What a bitter-sweet memory simple, little bobby pins brought to me today.
“I am so proud of you Mum, even more now that I am older, because I have been to war too. Now, I know how hard you had to fight. I have fought the codependency battles. Your unconditional love and your strengths made me stronger. I love you and I miss you everyday.”
She was morning glory personified
Beautiful and stunning
Her radiance glows with the sun
But more than being a hardy vine
A scenic perennial flower
Morning glory symbolizes her life
She’s a hopeless romantic
Who loves in vain—
Even a forbidden one
Spent all her waking days
With a hopeful heart
To an unrequited love, she smiles.
DAY 8:And now, for our prompt (optional, as always). It’s Friday, and writing poems isn’t easy! So let’s give ourselves a break with a simple prompt today. Poets have been writing about flowers since, oh, the dawn of time. So today, I challenge you to add your own poem to this long tradition, by finding a flower, and versifying in its honor. Happy writing!
I like flowers but I don’t really have a specific favorite. I got this idea from my A to Z post a while ago and I couldn’t be happier…
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Good morning, citizens of blogosphere! I would like to welcome you all the newest addition to my blog, the Writer’s Quote Wednesday. I have finally decided to join my dear friend, Jade of Jade M. Wong in shining the spotlight onto our chosen poet or writer every Wednesday (Thursday on my side of the earth). I hope you will like their work too! 🙂
I have heard so much about You
that should make me stay away from You
but I just couldn’t help myself
I got to close and the mere scent of You enchanted me
As for my first guest, I am happy to introduce a dear friend of mine who pens about love and romance, and everything in between. Lately my muse and I have been through a series of hiatus and it was his poems that nudged the hopeless…
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Timely…one of my favorites.
“I can’t believe you’re serious about doing this. What if people see you?”
“That’s what the mask is for.” He pointed to the white mask already secured on his face, his identity hidden behind an oversized smile, red cheeks, and a wide black mustache.
“And if they decide to shoot you first and ask questions later?”
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This was six years ago and my daughter has been sober and free for over four years. Praise God. Looking back from then to now is a thrill and a chill. Amen.
I publish tons of personal stuff on my blog, but I wasn’t going to write about my thirty-nine year-old daughter going to prison, not because I’m ashamed of her, but because the hurt is so enormous.
I have made mistakes. Some that will haunt me until the day I die. Everyone makes mistakes. We all pay for our mistakes too, whether it’s through Karma, prison, divorce, broken hearts, family members who never speak to us again or whatever. You don’t have to wait for an official Judgment Day.
I believe that every day on Earth is Karma’s Judgment Day.
My heart has been sliced, diced and pureed, but much of it I can blame on myself and my bad decisions, decisions made from fear and insecurity.
And just when I think that I have bottomed out on heartbreaks, my middle child, who has also made bad choices, gets herself in enough…
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I think he said…
Got an awesome present today. 1979 Toro and cart. Gonna paint them pink.
Some women want diamonds. All I ever wanted was a farm. I have two acres to play with now.
From my garden in Florida last February.
I slipped into living in the moment Saturday morning. I didn’t plan it and that’s how it happens best.
I bought flowers on Thursday afternoon. On Friday, it was freezing and windy, so I had to leave creating a patio garden around my little trailer for another day.
I picked a bouquet from the hibiscus and the roses, and I spent all day Friday taking pictures.
Saturday morning, when I woke, it was still cold. I peeked outside and I could feel the sun on my face, so I pulled on a warm shirt and long pants and I went outside with my coffee.
Then, I played with the flowers.
As I trimmed and repotted the plants, I fell into my old familiar rhythm.
I started gardening with my mum when I was a toddler and she generously passed on her green thumb to me and to my two sisters.
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Awesome writer…I could read her all night.
“But I will tell you this, my love.
I would break my own heart for you.”
Maybe you will understand how much I need you if I let you go. Not for my sake, but for yours. Maybe you will see how much I burden you with my demons. My darkness. And maybe, at first, you’ll think I’m just trying to pull away. Or maybe, you’ll let go of my hand and let me go without hesitation.
I’m not sure which would hurt me the most. But I will tell you this. If it would make you happier, I would willingly break my own heart. I would do that for you. I would let you go, if only to give you a chance to be free. Free from my dark. Free from my broken soul. Free from me.
© Sarah Doughty
So tell me, do you think
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I will not use it.
I see that line every time I write something — in the old, old format. “SWITCH TO THE IMPROVED EDITOR” lurks above my editing every time I work. I would make it vanish if I could.
Why don’t I use the new improved format?
The new editor is definitely different, but it isn’t better. It’s more difficult to use. You need more steps to accomplish simple things.
Nothing has been done to improve the limitations of the original editing format. The spacing issues that have plagued every template I’ve used during the past six years are as bad or worse as are all the problems that come with pasting text from some other piece — even if it’s from another WordPress post. The “customization” has been reduced to the most simplistic possible format so you get choices like “Huge, Too Big, Too Small, Tiny, and…
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A little boy aged 8 years old told his mother that he wanted to meet God. His mother very sweetly told him, ‘Okay, dear but where will you find him in this vast Universe.’ The little boy insisted that he would set out to look for God and come back safely once he did.’ His mother knew that was not possible and did not seem to argue with him. She knew he would come back home so she packed his suitcase with two sets of his dress, a water-bottle and some packets of cakes for him on his way. The boy very happily started his journey, he walked a long distance and found a park! He was feeling tired so he decided to sit in the park and take some refreshment and water as he was feeling thirsty too. He opened a packet of cake to eat.
A little distance away…
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Take my hand
Lay me down in the green grass
Where Love flows eternal
Kissed by falling rain
Warmed by the rays of the sun
Beyond the Gate into the unknown
Where souls are at rest
And bones hurt no more
Where the lame walk
And blind eyes see
And where sorrow has shed its skin
Leaving just an open heart
Oh let me lie there
Feel the ancient touch
That heals all woes
Give life to bodies wracked with pain
Where the sweet singing of the birds
Echoes the voices of the angels in heaven
Oh let me lie let me lie
With You my Lord, my Love
With all who have gone before
Take my hand
Lead me to those green pastures
Just For you
God Bless America