Posted in Women Who Think to Much

Suicide No Longer An Option

Women Who Think Too Much by Jeanne Marie

DCP_1358

I look down at her limp body.

She is face down on the large bed, alone. Her fine, blonde hair is like a halo around her head as she lies so still on the brown, patchwork quilt.

As I watch her, I am sobbing. I don’t understand my gut wrenching tears. Why am I crying tears of desperation and tears of terror? I don’t know why I am hysterical and then, with a sudden sense of horror, I realize that it is my body on the quilt and I am not breathing. My body is cold. I am dead.

“Oh my God,” I think. “She finally did it, she really did it this time and there’s no rescue, there’s no turning back.”

“Why did she give up?”

“I don’t want to be dead!”

At this point, I no longer feel connected to the woman on the bed. I think of…

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4 thoughts on “Suicide No Longer An Option

  1. Let’s see if I can make this a bit clearer. Any thought of someone wanting to take their own life is a thought I don’t like. Therefore it’s hard to leave a like on such a blog. However I leave a ‘like’ on such a blog for the individual that had the courage to blog about such a difficult subject. I blogged about suicide the entire month of September (the National Month for Suicide Prevention). With the epidemic our nation has of suicides, we need more than one month to draw attention to this terrible situation.
    The message written within the blog is powerfully written and drew me in as a reader. I know what it’s like to believe I cannot go on, that my contribution to the world isn’t making a difference and neither will my absence. What always pulls me back is the fact that my husband needs me. It’s an argument I make with myself often. Additionally, the people we leave behind are also scared in their own way. I hope this explanation helps in some small way.

    Like

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